Children have more need of models than of critics. - Carolyn Coats, Things Your Dad Always Told You, But You Didn't Want to Hear
Interestingly enough this quote is a proponent for role models, not praise. Notice the author brings our attention to the fact that children are watching what we do more than they need us to tell them either what they did right or wrong. More of our communication with our children happens through our actions than through our words.
Never fear! I realize that most of us seek also to improve our communication through what and how we say things, so I address both our words and our actions. Just keep in mind that even as we improve our verbal communication, the old adage "Actions Speak Louder Than Words," is still true.
I have found it helpful to ask just before you say anything to your child, "Have I already said what I want to say through my actions?" If so, you don't need to say anything except maybe to voice what you notice and express curiousity for example, "I notice that you aren't working on your project anymore? Is there something I can help you with?"
If you haven't already said what you want to say through your actions, then begin to say it with what you do. Show that you value finishing projects by finishing the projects you start. Once you have done that you can refer back to the previous paragraph for something you might say verbally.
(stay tuned to this blog for more on this subject soon!)
Interestingly enough this quote is a proponent for role models, not praise. Notice the author brings our attention to the fact that children are watching what we do more than they need us to tell them either what they did right or wrong. More of our communication with our children happens through our actions than through our words.
Never fear! I realize that most of us seek also to improve our communication through what and how we say things, so I address both our words and our actions. Just keep in mind that even as we improve our verbal communication, the old adage "Actions Speak Louder Than Words," is still true.
I have found it helpful to ask just before you say anything to your child, "Have I already said what I want to say through my actions?" If so, you don't need to say anything except maybe to voice what you notice and express curiousity for example, "I notice that you aren't working on your project anymore? Is there something I can help you with?"
If you haven't already said what you want to say through your actions, then begin to say it with what you do. Show that you value finishing projects by finishing the projects you start. Once you have done that you can refer back to the previous paragraph for something you might say verbally.
(stay tuned to this blog for more on this subject soon!)
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